Will Blyton has had enough of The Stinking Shadow and tried to lock him in a trunk.
It didn’t work. The Stinking Shadow whiffs for Olde England and the stench broke the lock.
Will Blyton is always on the wrong end of Hamnet’s, the tiny boy trapped in a stone, insults. Always being one for an opportunity, Will has decided to use some on The Stinking Shadow. Who would you use them on?
Thou wilt regret this warty nose.
Leave me be, thou fetid skanky breath.
Thou art but a worm eating corpse.
Mule’s manure, that is what thou art.
Thou bent nosed fool.
Thou springy haired oik.
Get off thy knees thou feeble minded dog.
It wilt happen later, old septic earache.
Thou leaking guts.
Thou mangy rat’s bum.
Related articles
- Inspiration and Us – Childhood Books – Shakespeare’s Stories. (loonyliterature.com)
- Introducing children to Shakespeare by using insults. (loonyliterature.com)
- Will Blyton and The Stinking Shadow. (excerpt) (willblyton.com)
Will Blyton - The Alternative Detective 
Sorry to have been so elusive – my esteemed clients are keeping me busy just when I’d signed up to lots of wonderful blogs – all writers who suddenly decided to blog LOADS. Sigh, still trying to catch up with all the messages.
I’d use most of these insults on bankers and politicians apart from the last one, as it would constitute an insult to all decent ratties out there! I wonder, if there’s a dictionary for historic insults out there – the English language must have more insults and swear words than any other!
Thanks for reading. I’m glad that you are well. I am with you on the politician’s and bankers. In fact, I have just found out about those American Roastings – people go on a show and get a good old telling off. The Americans do it to actors – I think we would like to do it to bankers and politicians. I think the English have to have a lot of insults to cheer us up when the weather is pouring down and the country could do with some decent policy makers etc.. So rat’s bums to the lot of them. It’s lovely to hear from you.
Not sure if I’m imagining this, but thinking about, there might be a dictionary for Chaucer’s age that has only insults or proverbs or such things. Would be good to investigate, so you could use it for the next WB instalment. Good to hear from you, too. Am having a tea break at the moment.